:: my days... ::

Alhamdulillah....

it's friday, it's 3.30pm, and it's ramadhan.....
this afternoon i will go back to bogor, although my friends are going to have a "party" tonight, i guess i just have to pass it and hope i won't regret it.

it will be hard time for me for the next three days, face to face with a dillema. i don't know what will happen, i can't loose it all.

next monday i must come up with a decision "take it or leave it".... it's hard... i don't know, maybe i'm just affraid to face new things, new environment. and also affraid to leave things behind, i'm affraid that i make a bad impression to the one i left behind...... once again.... a dillema.....

i don't know if anyone will ever read this writings, i just hope writing what i feel and what i hope will give a little ballance in my emotion....

....................
do you really think that salary is above all??

abd muis, 15:39..... still have doubts....

:: me... ::

sesaat kubaca kembali rangkaian kata yang pernah kutulis lebih dari setahun yang lalu, kehampaan.....
segera kusadari, sampai saat ini diri tak juga menemukan perubahan, mungkin lebih buruk lagi.....

harapan....
yang ketika itu masih jauh dari pandangan
bagaikan setitik kecil nun jauh disana
di batas horizon penglihatan

setahun sudah berlalu
mungkin lebih
harapan itu makin jauh
tak terlihat

mungkinkah hilang??
mungkinkah terbang terbawa angin??

tak tahu lagi kemana harus mencari
harapan itu tak lagi termaknai
.......